Silly Rabbit, Halloween Is For Everybody!

Here in L.A., Halloween isn't just for kids. Sure, there's tons of kiddies, especially in the more well-heeled areas, running around in costumes with their bags and plastic pumpkins, trick-or-treating in the time-honored fashion. But on Santa Monica Boulevard in WeHo, once the sun sets, owls in the canyons hoot and bats begin to fly, neon starts to sparkle, and street lights brighten the dark alleyways and the well-trod sidewalks, the people emerge.

Some are leaving, some are coming, and some are doing both, but everyone is mingling in the street, on the sidewalks, and in the clubs. Most of them are in costume, and the outfits run the gamut from the ordinary, run-of-the-mill disguises you've seen since grade school, while others are quite creative, and a few are definitely outside the mainstream.

Tonight, after a long, busy day, I decided to use my costume yet again, and once I'd parked my car at a discreet distance in the tony wards of Beverly Hills, I trekked towards Doheny and Santa Monica, ready to join the hordes of revelers. I spent the next few hours wandering back and forth on the street, smiling and marveling at the potpourri of celebrants.

I saw the usual clowns, french maids, cops, devils and demons, skeletons, hobos, priests and nuns, murder victims, and the like. A fair number of animation icons were represented, including one person who had a huge "Chicken Little" head on-- in anticipation of the movie opening later this week, I suppose. Several Zorros roamed the crowd, and more than one Willy Wonka in the Johnny Depp fashion strolled the walk.

The gay denizens of the street, though, took the opportunity to push fantasy to the extreme. I hadn't seen so many people in drag since I saw Harvey Fierstein movies years ago. Some of the more fit/buff men dressed as fairies, in very skimpy outfits. One couple dressed as cowboys, in chaps, with no jeans underneath, exposing *ahem* their meaty rumps. Another couple dressed as Native Americans; one, as an Aztec warrior, the other in Plains garb, but both with emphasis on as skimpy dress as possible. Quite a few superheroes abounded, and the majority were gays-- at first I thought perhaps it was just a comic book nerd, but then I noticed more and more gays dressed as Captain America, Superman, Batman, and the like. Thinking about it, it does make sense-- those sculptured arms, the *ahem* generous basket in the crotch, the chiseled good looks. I can see how little gay boys secretly fantasize over superheroes (makes me wonder if Frederic Wertham was actually on to something when he denounced Batman and Robin's "relationship" in the 1950s, rather than overreacting!), and carry the fascination into adulthood.

The ladies weren't always much better-- the last time I saw this much cleavage was in a brochure for Rio and other exotic destinations. Quite a few couples went in "team" costume concepts-- Mickey and Minnie, Jack Skellington and Sally (from "The Nightmare before Christmas"), a hustler and a "pregnant" lady, and the like.

The costumes I saw ranged from homemade to elaborate and expensive. Regardless of how the clothes were fashioned, some of the best costumes I saw were those worn by a group of people, in "theme" costumes. For example, I spotted a group of Oompa Loompas (and I'm not talking Oompas from the recent Johnny Depp version, but Oompa Loompas in green wigs, maroon shirts and white pants-- the works). Several packs of cards ran around, and I spotted Dorothy, the Scarecrow, and the Tin Man all together. Alice in Wonderland and the Queen of Hearts graciously promenaded in tandem, while Alex and his droogs prowled the streets, bringing "A Clockwork Orange" to life. The best group theme I saw was a varied pantheon of gods-- Isis and Anubis, Mars and Venus, and Ganesha all walked together. Ganesha was outstanding-- the fella wearing it actually had an elephant's trunk, blue-painted skin, four arms, and the works. Anubis was a black guy, who walked around with a fantastic mask on, Egyptian headdress, a loincloth, no shirt, and sandals. Isis had her "feathered" wings and a serpent crown. Another group dressed up as the whole Mario Brothers team-- Mario, Luigi, and pals.

Politics, history, and current events occasionally reared their heads as well. Quite a few gladiators roamed the Boulevard, while a fair number of larger men dressed as Roman emperors. More than one monk (myself included) could be spotted in the crowd, and a number of people chose to dress in Egyptian or Roman fashions. One guy dressed up as Mount Rushmore, while I spotted George Bush carrying a sign: "Bill Clinton got screwed for a blowjob; I screwed everyone." But one costume I spotted was both creative and pushed the envelope for tactlessness- one guy actually dressed up as a Katrina victim, with a cardboard roof/house around his middle, with fake legs propped up on the roof, and carried a sign that said, "Katrina Victim/I need Help" with "help" crossed out and replaced with "beer". Needless to say, he carried a Bud in his hand as he wandered through the crowd. Others dressed as Hooters girls, and I spotted one guy in a penis costume-- yes, I kid you not. Definitely not family viewing material!

There were so many different and creative costumes, I can't remember them all. I wish I could have taken pictures, but our nice camera is currently enjoying a sojourn in D.C., so I have to make do with my memories.

It was a fun evening, and for the most part, I was able to navigate Santa Monica Boulevard with ease, with the exception of one area surrounding a stage, where bands were performing. The crowds actually got so thick that I was partially crushed, pushed, smooshed, and finally turned around and forced back the way I came. I was able to jostle my way over to the side and escaped what could have been a very uncomfortable situation. I also had to put up with the largest amount of cigarette smoke I've had to breathe since I went to parties in college. I finally reached sensory overload, and decided to head out-- there were still tons of people as I left, and still others were arriving.

Now, who said Halloween was for kids only? *grin*